Monday, February 20, 2012

Would it be better to NOT tell my daughter what I did?

I went to get in my car to go to the airport and the battery was dead. I called the auto club and they could not get there for 2 hours. I would have missed my plane if I had to wait for them. I was really in a panic as I had to catch this flight for an important meeting. I started calling people in my phone book for help and nobody was available to help me. In desperation I called the last name in my phone book, my daughter鈥檚 ex husband Joe. He immediately came over and got me to the airport on time to catch my plane. I was very grateful but he would not take any money for his help. He told me he would meet me on the return trip and take me home.



My plane was late coming home and they did not serve any food on the plane so I really needed to eat something. On the way home I told Joe I had missed a meal so he took me to Ruth Chris for the best steak I ever had. When I got home, he had replaced the battery in my car. He would not take any money for that either.



My problem is that if I tell my daughter what Joe did for me, taking me out to eat, she might think that it was a date with Joe and that would be wrong for me to do that (or would it). Joe was just being a friend. Should I not tell her what happened so nobody will get their feeling hurt.



Advice please.Would it be better to NOT tell my daughter what I did?
Wow Ruth's Chris for dinner...sounds like a fun date. You shouldn't be going out with your daughter's ex without telling her.
He used to be family to you and he helped you in time of need. he was being a friend. nothing wrong with that. not a big deal, if you think your daughter would get upset because its likely she will (usually divorces hold resentment) dont say anything. either way, just forget about it and move on. no point in causing drama when there waas no drama to begin with.

but, if this was planned or flirting and wasnt innocent, you need to realize thats wrong.Would it be better to NOT tell my daughter what I did?
tell her. She should be old enought to understand if he drives. If not, he might tell her, and not explain fully.
I would tell her, because if she finds out from someone else, and you haven't told her......



If you did nothing wrong then you have nothing to worry about.Would it be better to NOT tell my daughter what I did?
Joe did nothing to hurt you. He was there when no one else was. He replaced your battery and took you out to eat. That is a gentlemen. He was there for your return flight. He took no money. He did this because he seen you were in need of help. That man you can count on. Idk what happened between your daughter and Joe but he seems like a keeper. So let her know. She has no right to be upset with you. If anything she should give him a call and thank him.
Your daughter divorced this, apparently very nice and generous man, and she has nothing to do what he chooses to do. You simply asked for help and he provided it. No betrayal of confidence nor of any established rules of divorce relationships. Your private life is only your concern as well. There is no need to feel any pain if terms of your and your daughter's relationship. No need to tell her at all. Besides you are putting thoughts into your daughter's head about what she "might" think about the dinner. Might not even happen. But, hey, she is your daughter and you must decide. I think keeping silent is the best option. Best of luck. PS I have eaten at Ruth Chris as well and it is an excellent place to eat. Not cheap for sure! Glad you got rescued. But he should have accepted payment for the battery, at the very least.
I`d tell her. Explain in detail what happened like you have done on here. It`s no big deal. It she heard about it later, she would think you were purposely deceiving her.
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